I decided it was about time to write a post that wasn't entirely about David, even though he is the most exciting thing that goes on around here. He has been quite a handful the last month. After coming home from visiting our parents over Christmas David's sleeping schedule got totally thrown off. He had the flu, then Ryan and I did, then we tried having David wake up at 8:00 instead of 7:00 so I could get myself put together in the morning after sending Ryan to school, but when we did that David wouldn't go to bed until sometime between 10:00 and 12:00. Considering my bedtime has traditionally been 10:00, that didn't work too well for me, plus he was really hard to put down for naps. This week we have gone back to getting him up at 7:00 and he does a lot better going to sleep at night and for naps.
David still doesn't sleep all the way through the night. The doctor told me last week that it is probably more my fault than his, which I understand. I have struggled with this for the last four months, whether to let him cry himself back to sleep at night. He cries so hard and doesn't settle down that I couldn't just let him cry, but doctors and other professionals say to let them cry - to some degree or another - or else you will ruin them and they will never sleep through the night. So I have worried and worried over whether I have been ruining my child, but finally came to a resolution within myself that this child needs me to respond to him when he cries. Maybe that's part of the reason why he is first, so I could actually do it. It has been so tremendously hard to wake up so often at night, and therefore be so tired during the day and not get much done, but slowly he is getting easier to put back to sleep. At some point he started falling asleep by rocking instead of nursing, so that was a step. Until recently I had to nurse him back to sleep right after he started crying. If I didn't it would be at least 1 1/2 hours before I could get him to go back to bed. This week I have been able to pick him up and go into the bathroom and turn on the fan. He falls back to sleep right away, but I have to hold him for 20 minutes or so before laying him down or he wakes back up. So he is making progress toward not needing me as much. It has been hard for me to get my heart and mind in line with each other - it is really nice not to be second guessing myself.
So, with sleeping patterns not being ideal I haven't had much time for anything other than taking care of David and keeping us all fed and clothed. I am a bit envious of the blogs I read with moms posting the different things they have made - so many neat and crafty things to do! I have started to learn to crochet, but haven't had much time to do it since I have to do it when David is sleeping because he wants to play with the yarn so badly when I have it out. I should have a little more time between when David gets to sleeping better and when it is time for the next kid, but, as I finally figured out, what it comes down to is learning how to be a mom and a wife and a homemaker and how to fit it all together.
2 comments:
Chris said when he read this, it was like hearing me talk!! That's because about 2 years ago (with Elsa) I was singing the same song. Actually, more like lamenting the same lament. Take care of my child, respond to her needs. Let her cry? Chris was finally the tough one and had me cover my ears and he would go in and sit by Elsa and talk to her while she cried. While he was doing this I would cry in my bedroom... I'll say, it was a LONG process, but I think at about 1 yr old or maybe even 14 months she finally slept from 9pm to 8am without waking up. I think we got her down to one awakening around 10 months. I can TOTALLY empathize with you!! hey, email me your phone number. Maybe we can talk sometime while our kids scream in the background!! :)
Hi Heather, I hope you don't mind I ran across your blog by way of Chris and Audra's. What an adorable little boy!!!
As far as the crying-it-out method goes, here's my two cents. In my limited experience, it seems to work better if done at the right age, and with strict consistency. With Jay we were forced to have him cry it out at 3 months (which seemed WAY too early) because he wouldn't go to sleep for the night until 4am. I stayed up with him till then for 2 months before Adam and my mom insisted we let him cry it out to get on a more regular schedule. He cried for an hour with us going in every 15 minutes and finally went to sleep around 1am. After that, it wasn't too difficult to get him down earlier and earlier until he was going to sleep at 7 and he still is (2 years old).
But I think the ideal time to have them do it if necessary is 4-6 months, when they for sure shouldn't be needing to nurse at night (6 hours at least). That's worked well for Eli. But if you're not consistent, if you leave him to cry to sleep one night then give in and get him the next, he'll just cry longer the following night. Anyway, obviously all kids are different and you know what yours needs, but maybe that will be helpful for the next time around :)
Post a Comment